45 degrees off

Seeing the same thing from a different angle.

Broken Tools

Very often, my hands hurt.

Not just a little stiffness or ache that a little rest and hand massage will fix. No, this is a pain deep inside my hands. Or maybe on the surface. Perhaps both. That’s the trouble… it reaches a point where I can’t tell you exactly where it hurts, just that it does and I want it to stop! It’s a warm pain in the joints, like if you go for an MRI and they tell you the contrast may cause a warm sensation. That warm feeling can feel like a wave passing over and through you. I get a very similar warmth just lingering in my painful joints of my hands. That’s not even counting the feeling of hot needles stabbing at the joints.

None of that helps me get my work done. And there has been some trouble with doctors. Back and forth with general practitioners and specialists… a lot of boring, frustrating details. The good news is that some progress is being made! The bad news is that’s only been true for one day. Not much progress gets made in one day.

My hands are my tools. It’s likely my tools are broken. We’re looking at arthritis, but the question is which type. It’ll take some time to find that out, and possibly to get me to another doctor if it’s not a type my current doctor can treat. And even treatment can take some time to work. But I’m not ready to throw my broken tools out, or say I can’t do the job with them anymore.

I may work slower. On days that I can work, I may choose not to draw or crochet at all. There’s a life to be lived that is my source of inspiration for my creations! I don’t want to get so focused on the bucket I carry that I forget to go back to the well where I fill it.

I’m in the middle of crocheting things for Craftypodes, the Etsy shop my husband and I have opened together. (You can find Craftypodes on Facebook, Google+, and Twitter.)

I have mushrooms to finish painting.

I’ve added some work to Positive Space. The above picture is one of the Kindle cases I’ve added. You can find more of those at Everyday Myth, including my Alice in Wonderland-inspired work.

The Kindle cases make me think of drawing on book covers.

There’s also a section in Positive Space now for products with the art from my black and white floral fabric There’s a part of me that really wants to take one of the notebooks and color the cover with markers.

I have not forgotten that I have a request to fill for some new gift tag designs this year, but one of the people who requested that has also requested a crocheted gift for her birthday and I need to fill that request first. Whether I can get around to everything else I want to do or not, requests from my sister’s children make me very happy!

Maybe my tools aren’t really broken, but they are worn down to the point where I need to be careful with them until they can be repaired. If only hands could be replaced like pencils and yarn! I know there’s something of value for me to carry out of this experience. I just haven’t found it yet. It may be something I don’t realize until years down the road when I say, “Remember when my hands hurt so much for a while…”

Enjoy what’s available now. I promise there will be more. I just can’t promise when.

 

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